My Story

The title of this blog is South Africa’s national anthem (“God Bless Africa” in Xhosa). It has become a favorite song of mine. (Click HERE to hear the song). If you are interested in what my deal is with South Africa primarily, then I suggest you skip to the middle section of this entry. I can be rather long-winded.

How “It All” Started

I am Sarah Woolley, daughter to a painter and an art gallery owner, sister to a bird fanatic. I am a native Oregonian and 28 and 1/2 years old. I began school in Massachusetts at Hampshire College, school for professional hippies, took three and a half years off, and graduated from Marylhurst University in Oregon in 2006 with a B.A. in creative writing and fine art.

My whole life I have asked “Why?” I think we all ask different questions, and this has always been mine. Why, why why. All through my life. As a kid, an adolescent, and later, an adult. I think it’s hard to be someone who asks why so much, but I also like it. The biggest why came for me when an ex-boyfriend committed suicide. I couldn’t ignore the question that time. It led me to an even deeper quest to discover if there was a God. And if there was, why? What are we here for? What is the purpose?

I was most interested in Christianity my first year in college after I had the revelation that those three people closest to me at the time professed an allegiance to Jesus (one of them the later-deceased ex). Having had an unsatisfactory experience growing up Methodist (no fault to Methodists), I had to know why and how these friends could believe what they did. So I began to ask. And they taught me to pray.

I prayed for years and even attended bible studies, continuing to ask questions. I have always been very liberal in orientation and so definitely had a lot of beefs with what the bible said. And the first times I remember feeling really close to God are when He- the God of the bible- began to answer me. He began answering prayers. Small things, like showing me where my wallet was when I was going crazy, and telling me what was behind some health problems- very concretely- when I asked Him.

Still, I was hesitant. I didn’t know what committing to Him might mean. Would it totally change my personality? Would I still be able to ask “why?” Would I still be Sarah Woolley? And (to a girl who cares about what others think) would I have to talk about Him to other people? So I held off for some time. But eventually, after realizing that even I (always generally achieving and successful) was capable of failure, and that I had my own mental issues that, if not taken care of, could lead to my own demise, I couldn’t really deny it any longer. He had made it clear to me in so many ways that He was the “real deal.”

So, in the spring of 2002, I finally asked Jesus into my heart. And although it was definitely gradual, I found that I was changed, but not in the ways I had feared. Jesus was a part of me, working in and through me, and although He had been with me all my life, He was ultimately happy that I had chosen to be with Him.

After I made the commitment to follow Jesus, I had an insatiable desire to know Him better and grow in maturity with other Christians. I went to Europe and attended a bible school in the alps, where my faith was sharpened and deepened as I learned and grew with other fellow Christ-following strugglers. We traversed canyons, caves, and mountainous ledges together, taking risks of which we never knew we were capable. I also trekked 500 miles across Northern Spain (“El Camino de Santiago”) on my own, which I now liken to Jesus’ “forty days in the wilderness” experience; it was shaping, challenging, and faith- testing.

I had a lot of time to think on that Camino trail, and so I spent a bit of time figuring out what to do next in my life. I had always wanted to graduate from college, so when I got home I enrolled in the Interdisciplinary Studies program at Marylhurst University. There, I remembered that I was capable of doing things- this time I understood it a little more inherently. I wasn’t doing them to “perform well” for others, but because I wanted to grow and become who God had created me to be. And slowly He began to bring that back to me- who I was- as though it was an old, forgotten dream.

“My Deal With South Africa”

One day, I cried out to God that He would remind me of what my passions were. At a loss, I went for a walk and came upon my high school art teacher, who just happened to have an old painting I had done in the backseat of her car. It was of a ragged little African boy holding out a plate of food, surrounded by flames. Little by little pieces “came” to me, through relationships, classes, and many times, my own art. Surprised as I was, a theme of Africa began to emerge. I volunteered at a refugee organization teaching ESL one-on-one to a couple of women from Africa and particularly befriended a single mother from Rwanda. The more I learned about Rwanda and the genocide my friend escaped, the more my heart tore for the country.

I knew that after I graduated I wanted to be among fellow believers, learning and growing, and further discerning His vision for my life. Actually, the possibility of going to Mars Hill Graduate School, a seminary in Seattle, WA, is what fueled me all through going to Marylhurst. But when I went to visit it nearing graduation, I realized that I was done with academia, at least in that form, for the time being. I took the theme of Africa as a sign that maybe I should try a short-term missions trip, something I’d never done. I particularly was interested in going to Rwanda. At the same time, a good friend and spiritual mentor of mine had told me about NieuCommunities, a year-long apprenticeship ministry devoted to communion with God, growing in community, and exploring what “mission” was. One of their sites was in Pretoria, South Africa.

Although I could only barely discern it at the time, that was pretty much exactly where God wanted me. At the suggestion of a NieuCommunities adviser, I “sampled” NieuCommunities on a two-week “Road Trip” in August, basically to find out whether this was the right next step for me. By the end of the trip, I knew that it was, but was worried about finances. Soon I felt God say to me that He was bigger than my finance issues, and I needed to just trust Him for that.

With only a few months to raise support, I applied for the year of 2007 in Pretoria, South Africa. It was a year that transformed my life and sent me in the direction I feel my life will be heading ultimately. It was a year of living in community and growing closer to people than I ever have before. Our relationships with God (individually and together) deepened as we reflected and practiced spiritual disciplines such as prayer, meditation, simplicity, and study. Throughout the year we discussed and grew in our understanding of what it means to be “missional” as Jesus and His disciples and other biblical characters were. We read books such as Dallas Willard’s “The Divine Conspiracy” and Alan Hirsch’s “The Shaping of Things to Come” and talked about relevant ways of embodying “church.”

Last year, I learned more than I knew possible about myself. Aside from taking a variety of personality tests, we also learned what some of our spiritual gifts and temperaments were, and I felt both affirmed and pleasantly surprised at some of mine. My top gifts were discernment, wisdom, pastoring, and exhortation (all of which may look different in each person). I learned that God has put a strong passion for justice on my heart and discovered that that was a large part of what was fueling the ministry I had chosen for the year: helping to tell women’s stories.

Most of the theme of the year, for me, ended up being about dreams. God handing me back old dreams- nearly forgotten- that were deep, strong, true. And saying “Here, I want you to have these.” That’s what He did at the end of our “listening” posture, when we were encouraged to choose a ministry to dive into, and I connected with fellow apprentice Barbara on wanting to create a book of sorts of South African stories. Primarily for the sake of making their voices heard, but also to educate the privileged, presenting a slice of less-privileged lives- struggles and victories both. And ultimately to glorify God, bringing the worth of these individuals to the light. Barbara and I focused on women, and succeeded in interviewing seven (from the township and the city) by the end of the year.

The “Future” (Aren’t Quotes Cool?)

It was around the middle of the apprenticeship, however, that we all started looking ahead and asking ourselves “what next”? An old panic came back to me as I imagined all of the “realistic” things I could or should do, none of them feeling right. I just wanted to know what God wanted. Finally one night, feeling quite desperate, I heard God- almost visually (go figure)- tell me that what He really wanted for me was what I wanted for myself. The dreams of using my creativity, of working missionally, traveling, effecting change in the world, writing, photography, art- you know, the list goes on as far as what I might wish. And he said, “That’s what I want for you. It’s not necessarily the easier path- in fact it will take more courage to follow this path of your dreams than another- but it’s what I want for you,” or something like that.

Dang, God! So what did that- “following my dreams-” end up looking like at the end of the year? By the end of the year I was seriously considering becoming staff of NieuCommunities South Africa. It just seemed to fit. The culture, the NieuCommunities’ philosophy, the people, the ministry I was involved with. And I really loved South Africa. Sometimes the simplest clues- like really being content in something or somewhere- are not enough for us, so I batted the idea around for a while and spent time with God on it. Through praying, journaling, and confirmation through others, I realized it was the right choice. I met with all the rest of the staff, and they invited me on the team!

Before I forget, there was one more really tangible way God answered my dreams last year: He provided an opportunity for me to visit Rwanda. A good friend and pastor from Oregon had teamed up with a South African pastor with whom I was acquainted and were bringing teams of people to visit Rwanda for a week, to learn about reconciliation efforts and amazing work new churches were doing in and around Kigali. This friend invited me to come, and I went for a week right after our program ended in November. We visited genocide memorial sites, heard horrific and awe-inspiring testimonies, and met and were served by some of the sweetest people on earth.

Here is a photo of some of our group listening to testimonies of former perpetrators in the genocide who have repented of their violence and are living with former victims in a community called “Peace Village”:

But oh yes! The “future”! Since I returned to my hometown of Portland, Oregon in early December, I have been reconnecting with people, becoming official with Church Resource Ministries, the parent organization (which I am so proud to be a part of- no, they didn’t pay me to say that) of NieuCommunities, and raising support for the next two years of ministry. When I return to Pretoria, I will be joining the NieuCommunities staff there, helping to apprentice new apprentices coming through (actually this year, they’ve already started- I’ll be joining them mid-year) and continuing my ministry of telling South African women’s stories. Here’s the best part (one of them): Barbara, my ministry partner from last year with whom I’m writing the book, is joining staff as well! She’ll actually get there a bit ahead of me. So we’ll be able to finish and hopefully publish the book together.

This season of being back in Portland, I have learned and grown in many areas. God has been testing me maybe more than ever before. I have learned that sometimes He doesn’t always want me to know “why” about certain things. This season for me has been about the beauty of relationship and the simplicity of ordinary miracles. I have learned that I really can do nothing apart from God (especially raise support within a couple of months) and that dependence upon Him is essential to truly remaining in Him.

And now- now I am connecting with people before I leave. To forge new friendships and to celebrate old ones. To share my ministry vision with those who may feel led to join my financial and prayer support team. But ultimately, to make life-long connections in order to keep in touch and involve others in the next journey in my life. If you’d like to receive my regular updates via email during my time in South Africa, please email me at skwoolley.girl@gmail.com and I will add you to my update list. Until May 25th my mobile phone number will be (503) 789-8971. Please call to chat, to connect, or if you have any questions regarding support opportunities or my upcoming ministry. Thank you for hearing my testimony. Is asking “why?” worth it? I think so.