My Life is Like the Morning Fog

First of all, thank you to those of you who have been faithful in following through with the donations you have pledged or given. I hope you know how much I appreciate it. You have helped me get closer to my goal! I also want to honor all the kind words, encouragement, and prayer support as well, which are invaluable.

I thought I would update those of you who are interested to hear where I’m at, both support-wise and personally.

Where I’m at With the “Plans”

I am currently at 65% of my monthly goal and 100% of my relocation expense. So it is coming along! And that is very exciting. I had wanted to be further along in order to purchase a plane ticket in accordance with “plan A” (see post below). Thus, I have a revised plan. Let’s call it: “plan A, part 2″ (this is so dorky, excuse the dorkiness). The revised plan is to head straight to Rwanda from here, leaving around May 15th. After the Amahoro Conference, I will return to South Africa and commence being NieuCommunities staff! I still have to work out the details of luggage, and getting a cheap ticket (thankfully, I have found some good possibilities online). However, I really wouldn’t feel comfortable buying the ticket until I’m at more like at least 80% (ideally, 90%) of my monthly goal. So my newest deadline for reaching that amount is this Thursday, May 1st.

I want to be sure to communicate that I want this in no way to pressure anyone into either a.) feeling that they have to give or b.) feeling that they have to decide immediately on a commitment. The process is the same. I would still love to meet with any of you who are interested in hearing more about it all in person. For those of you who may be considering giving and who do pray, I encourage you to ask God how God would specifically have you partner with me in this. I will be checking back in with those of you who have expressed an interest. Although my greatest need at this point is for monthly or annual donors, I would just ask you to “sit” with God about it, whether for a few moments or a few days. I greatly appreciate donations of any kind, and no amount is ever too small. For those of you who already have an amount or commitment on your heart, if you have a chance to make the actual donation before May 1st I would greatly appreciate it. Just click in the sidebar on “Donate to Sarah” and choose from a couple of options. Please ask me if you have any questions too.

You can contact me at: (503) 789-8971 or skwoolley.girl@gmail.com

Where I’m at Personally/Spiritually

Now, after telling you about my plans. . . To put it bluntly, I am learning that God’s plans look relatively nothing like my own. Granted, while I feel that God is with me in my revised plan (or at least tolerating it), I also am constantly reminded lately that God’s ways are above my ways. Thinking about this earlier today, a certain verse came to me and I looked it up. It is in the book of James, chap. 4, vs. 14-15: “How do you know what will happen tomorrow? For your life is like the morning fog- it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. What you ought to say is, ‘If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.’” I felt God nudging me toward more of this way of thinking and away from my goal-oriented, plan-driven one. This is more of the attitude that I want to embody.

The past couple of days, God and I have been coming to a head with this issue, as I’ve felt like I’ve been struggling, striving so hard to make things “happen.” When I got home today from meeting with a really good friend who’s in transition herself and with whom I share particular mental health issues, I felt led to open my “little black book.” It’s actually this tiny little book I’ve been writing things in the past four years- and it’s not even halfway full! But I write down quotes I come across, notes to myself, scripture, etc. I’d like to share with you some of what I found that stuck out to me:

Note to self, 18th of June (some year): “I forgot that- that things work when you stop trying to make them work.”

Also: Ecclesiastes 7:13 “Notice the way God does things; then fall into line. Don’t fight the ways of God, for who can straighten out what he has made crooked?”

This last one is for all of us and is the reason why I dug out the book (cute little leather-bound one I bought in Seattle with my dad, BTW). It is also the very first thing written in it. I encourage you to read it slowly, note your reaction to it, and let whatever truth you find in it sink in: “At the last Judgement Christ will say to us, ‘Come, children of shame!’ And he will say to us: ‘Vile beings, you who are in the image of the beast and bear his mark, but come all the same, you as well.’ And the wise and prudent will say, ‘Lord, why do you welcome them?’ And he will say: If I welcome them, you wise men, if I welcome them, you prudent men, it is because not one of them has ever been judged worthy.’ And he will stretch out his arms, and we will fall at his feet, and we will cry out sobbing, and then we will understand all, we will understand the Gospel of grace! Lord, your Kingdom come!” -Fyodor Dostoevsky’s “Crime and Punishment,” reference from Brennan Manning’s “Ragamuffin Gospel”

P.S. My greatest prayer requests at this time include being God-focused, healthy, receptive to wisdom and discernment, protection, peace of mind, hope, faith, love, and the last but most important one at this time is grace. I recently forgot that I needed it. It happens. Thank you and God bless.

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